Poem
A few months ago, I posted a poem. I was hoping to get a little feedback on it, but such was not the case. I'm posting it again, this time with the grand admission that it is my poem. Yeah, I wrote it. It is, in fact, the most meaningful thing (to me) that I've ever written. I do not require comment or critique, though it would be welcome. I invite negative commentary as well, as I am not married to it. Here it is, one last time, forever:
12
The work-a-day
Gives way
To melancholy twilight
And pensive night.
Wash of salty air,
Heavy with unseen sea,
Fills the void with you
And useless, reckless dreams.
Libertine moon
Accomplice to
Relentless
Pounding
Surf
Sweeps me
Helpless
Through the door where you live
And where I am not myself.
12
The work-a-day
Gives way
To melancholy twilight
And pensive night.
Wash of salty air,
Heavy with unseen sea,
Fills the void with you
And useless, reckless dreams.
Libertine moon
Accomplice to
Relentless
Pounding
Surf
Sweeps me
Helpless
Through the door where you live
And where I am not myself.
posted by Kristine at 2:18 AM
3 Comments:
I can't believe I didn't comment on that
"Libertine moon" is the most amazingly graphic tug on the heartstrings. I long for a libertine moon to sweep me to equally libertine dreams
Kristine: I really enjoyed this poem. I'm probably somewhat of a philistine when it comes to poety, I prefer the more straight-forward, story-like poems of Frost, Longfellow, Poe, etc. But the whole flow of this poem is very graceful and easy to read. Thanks for sharing ...
I'm a total philistine when it comes to poetry as well. I just happened to write this one, and I liked it. I totally dig Poe, too, and especially W.B. Yeats.
And thanks, Lorna. "libertine moon" was one of the lines I thought was a little overwrought, but if you like it, it must be OK.
Post a Comment
<< Home